10 Things You Can Do Now That There Is A Twitter Ban In Nigeria

June 4, 2021

With the recent ban Twitter ban in Nigeria by the Federal Government, here are some fun things you can do with the time you spent on Twitter.

1) Farm

Since you have more time on your hands, you can engage in some productive farm work. That way, you can feed the nation.

2) IELTS

All the time you used to spend on Twitter can be converted into studying for your IELTS exam, so you can japa to a country that won’t be stressing you like this one.

3) Marry

Now that there are no fine people on Twitter to distract you, you can finally settle down with the person in your area that has been cutting eye for you. Sha invite us for the wedding.

4) Join the army

Now that our youth will no longer be wasting time on social media, they can channel that energy into protecting and defending the nation. Yes, we know Abubakar Shekau has been killed a few times before, but now you can kill him some more. At least if you join willingly, maybe they’d leave corpers alone.

5) Find the cure for HIV

According to Nigerian parents, the reason you’re not progressing in life is because you’re pressing phone. Now that Nigeria has banned Twitter, you have one less thing to make you press phone. Get ready to achieve your full potential.

6) Consume Zikoko content

Luckily for you, Zikoko content isn’t just on Twitter. With the ban, you can check out our website and see the full collection of things we have to offer. You can also check out our YouTube channel for videos that’ll take the stress off.

We’re not proud, we’re begging.

7) Find the cause of Lagos traffic

With all that free time, maybe we can finally come together as a society and figure out what’s causing all the traffic in Lagos.

8) Collect loan

Since there’s no Twitter, where will they be able to drag you and call you a debtor? My dear collect loan and RUN.

Please don’t say it’s Zikoko that told you o

9) Move to Ghana

That way, you will be able to use Twitter without Lai Muhammed and Buhari collecting it from you. Plus since Twitter wants to open offices in Ghana, you can easily hold Jack’s shirt if he does anyhow.

You and Jack when he rolls out a new Twitter service and he does not give you

10) Fix Nigeria

Since we all know that Twitter is the cause of all of our problems as a nation. Now that it has been banned, Nigeria will finally move forward. It doesn’t matter if there’s a security problem in the nation, or our roads are bad and we don’t have constant electricity. As long as Twitter has been banned, Nigeria has won.

Itohan Esekheigbe

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