Nigerian mums are some of the most special women in the world, and in honour of women’s month, we will be sharing some surprising and confusing behaviours a lot of them exhibit. If your mum does none of the things in this list, give a double offering in church on Sunday.
Nigerian mothers walking in to look for trouble:
1. They judge young people for getting pregnant before marriage.
If you check it now, you’ll see that some of them had their first child in their wedding photos. Maybe they think they are the only ones that can have sex before marriage.
2.They can shout for Nigeria and Africa.
Between them and Davido, only God knows who is louder. Better pray for yourself that the trumpet doesn’t sound on the day your mother is shouting or else you’ll miss heaven. The good thing is that she’ll miss it too.
3. They lock you at home but want you to have a boyfriend/girlfriend.
They spend all your teenage years locking you at home but want you to magically manufacture a husband when you are older. Nawa.
4.They get older and suddenly want a gist partner.
Please ma, I don’t have anything to talk about. Go and talk to your husband and your friends. When you didn’t gist with us all these years, we kuku didn’t die.
5. They put everyone in your business.
Before you say Jack Robison, they’ll call Iya Risi to report you to her. Honestly, this behaviour isn’t only confusing it’s also annoying. Your small crime was shouting back at her and now the whole world thinks you tried to kill her.
6.They always forget to defrost the meat.
They forget to bring out the meat from the freezer and push the responsibility on you. When you forget now as they did, they will start shouting. If they can forget, why can’t we also forget?
7. They ask you to pick clothes for them but still wear what was on their mind.
Don’t bother answering your mum when she asks you to pick cloth for her. You see, that dress that is on her mind is what she is still going to wear, she just wants to waste your time and call it bonding.
8. They want you to have a super memory.
They send you on 10 errands at the same time and want you to remember everything. If they are so invested in those errands why can’t they run it themselves then?
9. They act like sex education is a sin.
They throw you into the deep blue sea and want you to figure it out yourself. No one is telling them to teach us how to perform oral, just tell us what time is best to have sex. Simple and short.
10.They want you to respect their sleeping time but they don’t respect yours.
From shouting down the house the minute they wake up, to just disturbing your life for simply napping five hours a day. Nigerian mums don’t want to see you resting, it pinches their body to see you have peace.
11. Any small thing, they tell you to put it on their head.
Oya bend down now, let me put it on your head. No, they won’t bend down for you to put it on their head, all talk no action.
12.They always complain when their sons join the beard gang.
Madam, please let the world see his beauty, ok? The beard his daddy had in 1920 that made you fall in love with him, let the babes see it on his son too. Thanks.