We Ranked Nigerians Depending On How They Feel About Fridays.

April 5, 2019

For many Nigerians, the only thing worth looking forward to at the start of the week is when the clock strikes 12 after Thursday and the end of the work week finally arrives.

 

All of a sudden, 8 hours of pretending to like colleagues, alternating between Torrent tabs on laptops and extended lunch breaks don’t seem so bad — it’s finally the weekend, time to get loose.

For other Nigerians, Fridays are just Monday lite. There remains a ton of work from the week to be done, with the only perks laying in being able to work through the night, without feeling the need to curse their alarm clocks when they go off at 6am.

 

 

Different Nigerians have different attitudes towards Fridays, so being the all-observant, all-knowing busybodies that we are, here’s a ranking of Nigerians based on how they feel towards Friday:

The ones that are already sad because Monday is here.

I’ll be the first to admit that I have built a room and parlor on this table right here. Whatever happiness I might have towards it being the end of the week is usually overshadowed with the knowledge that before I blink and take two shots of tequila by the end of Friday night, Monday is going to be right there shaking its head and judging me for  thinking I had a right to have fun over the weekend.

 

What is this life?

Those ones that set timers on their phone as soon as they get into the office Friday morning.

You know those people that spend the whole day Friday looking at their watches and exclaiming : “ahan, it’s only two o’clock” every five minutes? Yeah, those are the ones that carry Friday firmly on their heads.

 

Look out for them, they’re the ones that pack their bags and use style to ‘check’ what’s happening downstairs, at the carpark, where their car is located very conveniently close to the gate, once it 4: 45pm.

Those people that don’t joke with their Friday plans and have a lie planned every weekend just for it.

Shoutout to the people still living with their parents, and have had to have a weekend ‘work conference’  and ‘Bible seminar’ every weekend for the past 5 months, just so they could hang out on Fridays nights. We salute you and appreciate the seriousness with which you take your Fridays.

The ones that aren’t about that Friday night stress and just want to sleep.

Then we have those people that cannot be bothered if Mo’hits is planning a free concert, that will include a P-Square re-union and Plantashun Boiz standoff, they just want to spend Friday sleeping and watching all the shows they used the office wi-fi to download over the weekend.

 

Those ones that spend the whole week gingering their friends to hangout, then pray their phones don’t ring, come Friday.

Look, there’s nothing like a 5-day work week, sprinkled with two-hour work commute to remind you that you must have been mad to think going out on Friday night was a good idea.

 

If you’ve never had to turn off your phone after assuring your friends you’re five minutes away from the club while laying in bed on a Friday night, then please show us your adulting ways.

For private university students, hitting 24 spots on a Friday night signifies a slow start to a weekend.

If you think you love Fridays, please take several seats and let a Private university student show you how it’s done.

 

Seeing as leaving school for the weekend is a freedom not always granted to the students, they are more than ready to go HAM when the opportunity presents itself. Clubs, bars, the beach, a financial workshop, any opportunity a Friday night brings, they’re ready to take it.

And who can blame them really?

How do you feel about Fridays?

Boyin Plumptre

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