The Zikoko Guide To Surviving Valentine’s Day As A Single Person

February 7, 2020

So Valentine’s day is around the corner and from the look of things, you’re probably going to be single by then. Oh don’t cry, you’re not alone in this. I will be single too, and if we are going to be honest, then you’ll agree with me that Valentine is trash. But if you find yourself still single by Valentine’s day, here are fun things you might consider doing to make yourself feel less alone.

1. Gatecrash a couple’s romantic dinner.

And then start a fight by claiming that the man (or the woman) is yours.

2. Order flowers and have it sent to yourself.

Buying flowers for yourself as a single person on Valentine's day

To spice things a bit, you can post a photo online saying, “Fornicating with married men has finally paid off.” After that, turn off your data and leave people to guess.

3. Fast and then attend a vigil at night.

It’s kuku on Friday. Why not spend it with your God. After all, God is better than a romantic partner.

4. Call your best friend and pretend that you’re about to collapse.

Image result for black person smiling in coffin"

Make it so real that they will sit with you and abandon their date. Will your best friend choose you over a man/woman?

5. Dress in red and scare people on the streets.

Who sent them to fall in love anyway?

Very important though: Nigerians are always angry, and you might be unlucky if you try any of these things with them. It could lead to this:

Someone might vex and curse you.

Or you could receive a hot slap.

Gbosa!

Or World War 3, Valentine’s Day Edition.

So, here’s what I think you should do if you find yourself single on Valentine’s day.

1. Practice some self-love.

Image result for genevieve nnaji in a spa"

Be your own lover, basically. Buy yourself gifts, take yourself out. Get a massage, a pedicure or facial. You deserve it, dear.

2. Read a book. Or short stories.

Image result for list of new nigerian literature

Allow your imagination to travel. You’ll be glad you did.

3. See a movie.

Image result for netflix logo"

Netflix and chill by yourself. Won’t that be fun?

4. Look at your goals for the year again.

Image result for black person planning

Add to it, take away from it, form new strategies.

5. Sleep.

Image result for black person sleeping"

If everything fails.

By the way, did you know that Zikoko is helping single people find love? Don’t sleep on it. See the trailer here:

Kunle Ologunro

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

February 24, 2020

Stress management in Nigeria sounds ironic as if you can manage all the stress Nigeria throws at you. It’s like driving with a blindfold – it just doesn’t make sense. That’s how a typical day in Nigeria is. However, if you follow these tested and trusted tips, Nigeria won’t kill you. You will kill it […]

Watch

Now on Zikoko

September 25, 2021

oraimo FreePods 3 Feature LeakFor a while now, oraimo has been cooking something awesome for her consumers, and it’s finally here. I guess it’s safe to say oraimo is like a fine wine that keeps getting better with time. When it comes to delivering a product that is not only affordable but also comes with […]

September 25, 2021

The subject of today’s Sex Life is a 29-year-old bisexual woman who talks about deciding to have sex after a car accident, getting over sex guilt and how she started grading her male sexual partners.

Recommended Quizzes

September 1, 2021

August is over, and here are some of our best quizzes from August. Enjoy: 1. QUIZ: Only Ajebutters Can Get 10/21 On This Quiz Some people like to form ajepako when they’re really ajebutter. Are you one of them? Let’s find out. 2. QUIZ: Sorry, If You’re Under 25 There’s No Way You Can Pass […]

November 12, 2019

Are you a single pringle, stuck in a complicated situationship or happily married to the love of your life? This quiz is here to guess your current relationship status, and as you know, Zikoko quizzes are incredibly accurate (don’t quote us). So, give a shot:

December 5, 2019

We already tried to guess how much you have in your account and your current net worth, and we think we did a pretty great job (keep any complaints to yourself). Now, we’re going to try and guess your monthly salary based on your relationship with money. Oya, take the quiz: 11 Timed Quizzes For […]

More from Inside Life

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

December 14, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.
March 12, 2020
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X