Dear Nigerian Job Interviewers, Please Stop Stressing Us

June 28, 2016

1. When you sit down and they say “can we meet you?”

Abi you cannot see me?

2. When they ask you “why should we hire you?”

Do you want me to starve?

3. When they ask you where you see yourself in 5 years.

My eyes are paining me, biko.

4. When they ask you how much you’d like to get paid and then cut that figure in half.

Hay God!

5. When they know you’re 25 and still ask for 24 years experience.

Is it fair?

6. How you laugh when the interviewer cracks a dry joke:

Ya very funny sir.

7. When you finish the interview and find out you still have 3 more tests.

Is it that deep?

8. When they ask you what their company goals are.

See question.

9. How you feel when the person interviewing you asks a stupid question:

You that you have the job you don’t even have sense.

10. You, waiting for them to get back to you.

You people should call me na,

11. When the interviewer that was cracking jokes with you doesn’t get back to you.

Where is the loyalty?

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