18 Things Every Nigerian Will Remember About Their Parents Having Visitors Over

July 4, 2016

1. When you suddenly see cartons of juice and you know visitors are coming.

It’s going down.

2. When your mother starts bringing out food you’ve never seen in the house before.

Wow! Is it like that?

3. When you touch something in the fridge and hear “IT’S FOR THE GUESTS!”

Chai! Is it fair?

4. When your mother wakes you up to clean your room before the visitors come.

Is it my room they are entering?

5. Your mother, bringing out the special cutlery reserved for only visitors:

Untouchable by anyone else.

6. When you hear the visitors arrive and you pretend to be asleep so you don’t have to go and greet.

I don’t have energy, biko.

7. When your parents want you to still dress properly just to come outside and greet.

Inside my own house again?

8. You and your siblings, greeting them in the presence of your parents:

Before your parents start the ‘you don’t know how to greet’ lecture.

9. How your parents see you as soon as the visitors enter the house:

Their unofficial waiter for the day.

10. Your parents face, when you linger in the parlour a little too long:

See ehn, just run.

11. When your parents that just finished insulting you start praising you in front of their visitors.

Oh? Wasn’t I just a stupid goat 5 minutes ago?

12. How your mother looks at you when the visitor offers you out of their food:

Her eyes = ‘You want to die today’

13. You, waiting in your room for the visitors to leave your house.

These ones should do and go.

14. When the visitors come with their children and you have to entertain them.

Ugh! NO!

15. When your parents start acting fake nice to you in their visitor’s presence.

Ah! Since when?

16. When the visitors are about to wash their own dishes and your mother tells them to leave it for you.

Hian! As they want to wash it, nko?

17. How you feel when they finally leave:

THANK YOU, GOD!

18. When your mother decides to “help you keep” the money they dashed you.

You know it’s gone forever.
Avatar

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

Watch

Now on Zikoko

Recommended Quizzes

November 14, 2019

The fourth season of Big Brother Naija came to an end over a month ago, but the conversation surrounding the housemates is far from over. So, in a bid to keep the fire burning, we decided to create a quiz that tells you which famous member of the ‘Pepper Dem’ gang is your soulmate. Take […]

November 30, 2019

With No Nut November FINALLY coming to an end, we’ve decided to mark the torturous month with some more horny content. After quizzes that guessed how many people you’ve slept with, how good you are in bed and who you’ll sleep with next, this one will guess when next you’ll get lucky. Take it to […]

December 3, 2019

Are you a professional Yoruba demon? Are you walking around in search of whose life you can wreck at any given time? Well, this quiz knows exactly how many hearts you’ve shattered to date, and before you lie that your result is inaccurate, just remember that Zikoko is never wrong. Now, take it and be […]

More from Oldies

May 27, 2021

Children’s day, a day set apart for kids. Like they don’t win at life already? You’re not paying bills or rent and you have a day to celebrate yourself? Get me their manager, please. On days like this, we can’t help but remember how good we used to have it so we wrote this article […]

February 12, 2020

Forget Tunji and Daniella, if you’re wondering who your best friend is, it’s most definitely the phone you’re either reading this from or the phone that’s somewhere within your vision; we know this because you’re definitely a phone addict that gets a little impatient when you’re too far away from your phone. Okay, let’s not […]

February 8, 2020

Yes, Valentine’s Day is almost here. Love notes, chocolates, hampers, and everything that comes with it. But while everyone is being hit by cupid’s arrow, there are some people who don’t even feel the hype. If you’re one of them, then grab a seat at this table. 1. You, when you hear that Valentine is […]

February 8, 2020

In case you have not realised it, Nigerians have a PhD in lying. Multiple PhDs, even. And there are some people who are professors in the art of lying, but we will keep that conversation for another day. Anyway, here is a list of common lies Nigerians tell. Don’t lie, we know you must told […]

February 8, 2020

Anyone who grew up in a Nigerian household understands that the Saturday routine does not change. It is the same yesterday, today and forever. If you are a true Nigerian, then you’ll understand these pictures and their connection to Saturday mornings. 1. Morning devotion by 6:00 AM. In which your parents can slap you for […]

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

December 14, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.
March 12, 2020
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X