6 Nigerian Men Talk About Wearing Alternative Hairstyles

March 31, 2021

The Nigerian society can be quite conservative. While the majority of older Nigerians struggle to enforce these religious and colonial-era dictates, a new crop of men is questioning the norm by wearing hairstyles outside the usual low-cut and cleanshaven look. I spoke to five of those men about their experiences going against the grain in a conservative society like Nigeria.


A pastor’s kid with a church leadership role who graduated from Covenant Univerisity is the last person anyone would expect to start wearing dreadlocks, but I did it anyway. It started during my internship break from uni. It was against school rules to keep a full head of hair or facial hair, so the first time I got the chance to do it was during my internship break. That was six months of fights with my mom, with her always saying “Your hair is too full, I don’t like it. It doesn’t look good.”

Fast forward to last year. After the lockdown, I twisted my hair for the first time and hid from my parents for some time until they saw a picture of me and called me “Gospel Naira Marley.” I knew I’d have to step down from church leadership.

My mother and I had several rounds of arguments, which I usually won by saying, “You did what you wanted during your youth. This is my time, and this is what I want.” My dad shouted and shouted. I followed him to church with the hair, with the whole congregation staring at me.

I think they’ve come to terms with it. At least, I haven’t been disowned yet. I’ve just fixed my locs and I’m going home for Easter. Let’s see if they’ve truly accepted my style [laughs].

Sometimes, I still have to wear a beanie to unfamiliar places to avoid scrutiny, especially when I’m likely to encounter the police. We all know how quickly that can go left.


I knew what I was getting myself into when I started wearing locs, but I didn’t mind. To be honest, I revel in it. One of the funniest things is how people call me “Marlian” when they can’t figure out my name.

The downside is I’m not in contact with over half of my family because of my hair. It’s a deeply religious family and if anything is out of line with the “bible”, it’s all-out war. It’s more about going against tradition than religion because those two concepts have become mixed up.

There’s an uncle who I hadn’t seen in a long time and the first thing he says when he sees me was to go on a tirade. “Does this look responsible on you?” he kept yelling. I just smiled, because I’m all out of my quota of fucks to give.

Now, I stay as far away from my extended family. I live with my mom and she has no problem with it. I’m a student and a freelance writer so there’s not much friction on that end. I’ve had multiple incidents with the police. One time, they stopped me at Sabo, pushed me into their minibus and drove me around while going through my phone and questioning me. They eventually let me out at Yaba.


My hair has been in twists since 2019. It’s grown a lot since then and I find it’s been mostly women telling me how much they love it and asking about my haircare routine. I get the occasional glare from strangers, but for the most part, people don’t act weird around me.

I get a lot of suggestions about it too. Some people think I should loc it while my boss at work wants me to add some colour to it. Most men tell me they’re inspired to grow theirs like mine. I’m always interested in hearing their stories and I gladly share any tips I can. The other day, my Uber driver asked if my hair was real and told me how he wanted to grow his out as well. It’s always a great conversation starter. Then again, I’m not sure if that’s mostly because I’m a pretty man.


I wear locs and not just because I’m a musician but because of how it looks on my head. It’s twisted and styled to sit like a crown on my head. It’s quite the sight. I’ve had it for six years so you can only imagine the length when I let my hair down. Whenever I’m walking down the road or in a cab, I see people staring at me like an alien that just arrived on earth in a UFO.

It’s not all bad. Sometimes, I get compliments, mostly from women. I’ve even made strong friendships from conversations that started over my hair. Other people go out of their way to make me feel uncomfortable by giving me condescending looks. You can literally feel the disdain in their eyes.

As neat and nicely packed as it looks, I’ve accepted the fact that I can’t work in a bank or corporate office. You should have seen the look on HR’s face when I showed up for my first interview at an architecture firm. That’s fine though. I’m a brand/motion graphics designer so who needs a corporate office anyway?

Let’s not even get into the times I’ve been profiled and randomly searched by the police. One particular encounter was jarring. I had just finished a studio session and was on my way home in an Uber. They stopped the driver and started asking me questions. They went through my phone to try to find something incriminating but they found nothing. The officers kept calling me names and said they would kill me there and nothing would happen. I was scared for my life. Even though they couldn’t pin anything on me, they collected 10,000 from me before letting me go.

On the family front, it’s a bit of a mixed bag. My mom and siblings like it, but I have a step-sister I haven’t seen in years because she threatened to cut it off while I sleep the next time we see. I posted a picture on Facebook and one of my cousins commented that I had better cut my hair before she comes to Lagos. I blocked her immediately.


I’ve had five different hairstyles. I started with curls last year, which caused a lot of trouble with my mom, the extended family and nosy family friends, mostly because of my religious background. I moved on to twists and pierced my nose and was trying to live with it lowkey. Going to work was no problem as my boss was fine with all of that. 

It was going fine until someone (I later discovered was my cousin) sent my picture to my mom on the day of NYSC POP. I received a very angry call from my mom and then my older brother who said if I got myself arrested for looking like a thug, it’s on me. My mom’s friend who was a pastor called and threatened to report me to God. I got sick of it all. My mom made me comb out the twist when I went home.

The most annoying part of it all is the questions I’m asked all the time. “This one that you pierced your noses, are you sure you’re straight?” Why are you making your hair, are you gay?” “Why do you do a manicure?” “Why are your nails painted?” I  just ignore all the questions because they’ll never understand.


Since I was a child, I always loved keeping an afro. I saw pictures of rappers and told my mom I was going to keep an afro but she wasn’t having any of that. After secondary school, I was old enough to stand my ground, so my mom would call an extended family meeting and they would plead with me to cut my hair. Most times, I declined. One time, it nearly became a physical altercation.

In uni, I was finally free to do what I wanted and I was wearing an afro every time. This wasn’t an issue until my final year when a lecturer said no boy with an afro would be allowed to present their research topic. This made no sense, as the lecturer was a supposedly educated and exposed one. Why should it matter what style I’m wearing? Eventually, I cut my hair short for the last time.

After graduation, I moved to plait my hair and surprisingly, it didn’t attract too much attention from the police as I feared. I like growing my hair. It can be tedious sometimes, but when you step out, the compliments you get makes it feel like it was worth it. I run an agency and my clients love it. It’s a great conversation starter.

QUIZ: What Colour Should You Dye Your Hair?

Olufemi Fadahunsi

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

November 5, 2020

We’ve all been there, at some point. (Yes, I’m judging you.) Sometimes, we get carried away with enjoyment that we forget there are neighbours around the house that can hear you crying unto Jesus, the author and finisher of your faith. They might be even more confused when they start hearing “Daddy, please.” I digress. […]

April 22, 2021

Puberty is a period of changes in an adolescent’s body. It can also be a very confusing period for them if they aren’t armed with the right information. From breaking voices to hair growing where it shouldn’t, I spoke to five Nigerian men about experiencing puberty. Ben Puberty didn’t take me by surprise because my […]


Now on Zikoko

June 19, 2021

The subject of this week’s Sex Life is a 27-year-old heterosexual woman who rarely has sex. She talks about almost getting married to an ex boyfriend who betrayed her trust by cheating on her multiple times and how this experience shaped her interest in sex.

June 19, 2021

There are friends you’ve had for years and those you have had for a short while, but how old is your longest friendship? Let’s find out: Relationships can be hard, and sometimes you just need someone to give you a bit of advice. Ask Ozzy is our new advice column where you send Zikoko the […]

Recommended Quizzes

November 14, 2019

The fourth season of Big Brother Naija came to an end over a month ago, but the conversation surrounding the housemates is far from over. So, in a bid to keep the fire burning, we decided to create a quiz that tells you which famous member of the ‘Pepper Dem’ gang is your soulmate. Take […]

April 3, 2020

While the rest of the world loves to treat our continent like a country, there are actually 54 African countries. So, in a bid to test your knowledge (and educate you), we’ve created a quiz to see how many of their capitals you can correctly name. Go ahead:

April 14, 2020

Every friend group consists of very different and specific characters — from the parent to the fun one — and it can be a little tough figuring out where you fall. So, we’ve created a quiz that lets you know exactly what kind of friend you are. Take to find out:

how tall are you
March 11, 2020

Did your parents give you enough beans when you were growing up? If they did, then you’re probably around 6’0″ and above. Either way, we created a quiz that can guess your current height (pretty accurately, if we do say so ourselves). Take to see if we nailed it:

November 27, 2019

Do you have a face that could make angels jealous, or should you really be walking around with a nylon bag over your head so you don’t scare children? Well, this quiz is here to answer that by telling you exactly how good-looking you are. Take and find out: 11 Quizzes For People Who Aren’t […]

More from Man Dem

June 17, 2021

Everyone has those small, seemingly minor things that turn them off people, commonly called an “ick”. We spoke to seven men about what their unforgivable, weirdest ick is and they had some hilarious answers. Dave People who are too eager are my biggest icks. Maybe it’s my fear of commitment, but the more someone makes […]

June 13, 2021

What does it mean to be a man? Surely, it’s not one thing. It’s a series of little moments that add up. Man Like is a weekly Zikoko series documenting these moments to see how it adds up. It’s a series for men by men, talking about men’s issues. We try to understand what it means to […]

June 10, 2021

The story of the 10 Plagues of Egypt you read in the Bible was scary but it didn’t tell of all the plagues. There was one more it failed to mention. No, it’s not COVID-19. It’s women coming to your house and stealing your clothes. The reason why your money is running out is because […]

June 9, 2021

If you’re a Nigerian man, you probably grew up hearing that there are things you shouldn’t talk about because men don’t talk about things like that. Well, we’re here to tell you that they lied. These are six things you should never be afraid to talk about. 1. Our failures Here’s the thing: Everybody fails […]

June 9, 2021

The Twitter ban has affected a lot of people and businesses in different ways. We tend to overlook the impact Twitter has had in various aspects of our lives. One of such aspects is relationships. I spoke to 6 Nigerian men who found love on Twitter. They had such interesting stories. Tosin We had been […]

June 2, 2021

Fat people in Nigeria go through a lot of abuse and degradation from society at large. It seems they get no respite from the constant passive aggression and fatphobia. The male perspective on this topic isn’t often heard, so we talked to 5 men about what it was like to be fat in Nigeria. Tolu […]

June 2, 2021

We don’t hear enough stories about men being heartbroken or dumped even though we all know it happens. Today, we spoke to four Nigerian men on the worst ways they’ve been dumped. Tokunbo, 24. I had this lady, we had been dating for about a year or so. I was still in uni then and […]

May 31, 2021

When most Nigerians hear ‘submissive’ in the context of a relationship, they envision a woman. However, this isn’t always the case. Many men are subs in the bedroom and many have embraced that and are living very happy sex lives. Over the past few weeks, I have spoken to several people I knew who were […]


Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

December 14, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.
March 12, 2020
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.