How To Avoid See-Finish If You’re Dating A Nigerian Woman

January 23, 2021

Nigerian women are the grandmasters of see-finish, and you must prevent this. The easiest way to do that is to date a short woman. But if you end up with a taller one or even a short one with gra-gra, this is how to avoid see-finish.

1. Never let her know your age.

The moment she knows it, everyone knows it. You’ll now pass and they will know you’re just 24. You with your big body. So, whenever she asks you, lie. Add 10 years to your age or 7. If she decides to break up, it’s her loss. Let her go and meet the small-small boys she can disrespect.

2. She must never call you “Big head.”

WARNING: Don't view these 16 Odunlade Adekola memes in public or else...!  [+Video where it all started]

Which useless big head? It’s her father’s head that is big. What nonsense. From “Big head,” she will start asking you to bring remote for her, and she will lose all respect for you. If she cannot you Boss, Senior Man, Oluaye Bambam, Baba Kofoshi, let her get out of your life.

3. Let her know that you don’t have time for rough play.

odunlade sorry | Zikoko!

You see that tapping of bumbum, refuse it for her. If she ever dares to hit you with a pillow in the name of a pillow fight, tell her to kneel down, raise up her hands and close her eyes. Is she alright??

4. DO NOT COHABIT.

Did you hear what I said? Do not cohabit! Why are you even cohabiting in the first place? When it’s not BBNaija. It is from cohabiting that she will see what you look like in the morning, and also see how vulnerable you are in the middle of the night. You don’t believe me? Ask Ozo, let him tell you his story.

5. You must never let her see your nakedness.

Even during sex, be fully clothed. Once she sees your complete bulk, her view of you diminishes. Small time, she will say, “Who do you even think you are?” And that, my brother, is a sign that you have “cast.”

6. Never split the bill.

7 Times This Jide Kosoko Meme Made Us Laugh - KRAKS

Either she pays or you don’t go out with her. It’s high time you recognised your self-worth before she insults you over a plate of seafood okro that does not have ponmo.

7. You must never moan during sex.

Ladies are dangerous. You moan like this, they know your weak point and will prepare to use it against you. So, even if her head game is fire, even if she is a wonder woman with a WAP, always do your mouth pim.

8. If you decide to marry her, let her bring her family to you.

All Hail The Nigerian Lord Of The Memes | by DigiEngage Nigeria |  DigiEngage | Medium

Oh, you want to go to her family house and start prostrating? So that next time you people argue, she will say, “You kuku begged to marry me”? My guy, it is high time you understood your self-worth oh. Men are hot cakes. If she does not marry you, her younger sister will rush you.

You be spec, never forget that.


Kunle Ologunro

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

September 15, 2020

Losing a loved one is never an easy thing to experience. No matter what age they were when they died, there’s just a feeling of finality that, amidst other feelings, tells you clearly, “You won’t see this person ever again in this life.” We asked some Nigerian men to tell us how it felt when […]

Experiencing puberty
April 13, 2021

Puberty is described as a gradual switch from childhood to adulthood and also one of the most confusing stages of being human. Although it is characterized by changes like periods, growing breasts and rounding hips, many women experience puberty differently. Here’s what six Nigerian women have to say about experiencing puberty. Fifi, 22 I was […]

Watch

Now on Zikoko

Recommended Quizzes

March 24, 2020

While we know that a lot of the best Nigerian artists deservedly have fans across generations, that won’t stop us from attempting to guess how old you are based on your taste in Nigerian music. So, take this quiz to see if we got it right:

November 27, 2019

Do you have a face that could make angels jealous, or should you really be walking around with a nylon bag over your head so you don’t scare children? Well, this quiz is here to answer that by telling you exactly how good-looking you are. Take and find out: 11 Quizzes For People Who Aren’t […]

November 11, 2019

Everyone has something to say about what kind of person they are. But how well do we truthfully evaluate these things? Not that much, I can assure you. The average person is always lying to themselves to make sure they look good. But you know what and who doesn’t lie? Zikoko quizzes that’s what. Take […]

December 11, 2019

In the past month, we’ve made quizzes that guessed the last time you had sex, how many people you’ve slept with, and just how good you are in bed. For our latest attempt, we will use your taste in Nigerian music from the 2010s to ascertain what you’re like in bed. Take to find out:

November 28, 2019

There are so many talented and stunning Nollywood actors that make it hard not to fall in love with them. So, while we all know the likelihood of us ending up with any of them is super low, it’s still fun to imagine a world where we actually stood a chance, and that’s why this […]

More from Man Dem

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

December 14, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.
March 12, 2020
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X